Recently, I discussed how we can move through change better. But how do we necessarily know which way to go? What do we listen to for guidance? Yes – we can follow the lead of others’, dive into spiritual practices, go with the majority, or stay put in our comfortable ways. What if you could learn to listen to yourself first (and trust it) then make your choice?
We’ve all heard the statements “follow your heart”, “listen to your feelings”, “trust your gut”, or “what’s your first instinct?”. Although commonly heard terms, these statements aren’t always easy to do in practice.
First, let’s differentiate between “feelings” and “guts” in the above statements. I believe they are two separate sensory experiences that can tell us a lot about ourselves and our innate reactions. Feelings are our emotional expressions that arise from the culmination of our mind and body’s combined experience. For example, the feeling of falling in love is felt throughout the body and is also the result of brain chemistry producing “lovey” hormones. Another example would be fear, which affects the body and it often is coupled with a fight or flight response combining both physical and psychological aspects.
“Guts” on the other hand, for this article, aren’t our physical intestines but rather that intangible sensation in your belly area that can feel like it’s “speaking to you”. You could also say this is an “instinctive quality”. Learning how to tune or enhance this sensation to listen to it can be instrumentally helpful to guide you along your way. These “gut” reactions or “instincts” can be the first stop in listening to yourself. The more this sensation is pondered and mulled over, it becomes muddled and overcome by feelings instead and the initial response becomes unclear or blurry and hard to decipher. When we find ourselves later on saying “I wish I would have listened to my first instinct or gut feeling” then you know that you need to work on trusting yourself and that initial spark inside.
In anatomy terms, I might compare “guts” to our para-sympathetic nervous system (no control over and just happens anyway) and “feelings” to our sympathetic nervous system (could be more controlled and might just happen anyway). When you have a “gut reaction” or an unexpected change in any physical, emotional, or psychological state pay attention to it. You may experience various bodily sensations that are small but abnormal, or out of the blue, or extremely intense feelings. Try to tune into your body and listen to what this “sudden alert” says for you. Stop what you’re doing, take a few breaths, and see if you can feel what your body “is saying”. For me, the faster I can tune into these sensations, the more I can learn about myself. The more often you can do this and make the choice you need to make based on your inner assessment, the more you will come to trust your instinct. Listen to yourself. 🙂
Feelings are also bound to join the mix and bring all kinds of different experiences forward. The ‘Mind’ and ‘Body’ play a huge role, in our feelings. Of course, spirit does as well. However, I want to discuss the connection between our mind and body today. I am referring to how our brain interacts with our physical body and also the area or energy field surrounding the head and that of the body area. When these two are disconnected it can be very difficult to “tune into the body” or “listen to what you’re feeling”. I would imagine that a great deal of the population is quite disconnected between the mind and th body as this is a natural result of growth, trauma, conditioning, and general wear and tear of life. So if you can’t ‘tune in’, I’d say that’s quite normal! 😉 For those who are keen on learning how to listen to yourself, then you might take up some personal growth activities. The most commonly thought of one is counselling or meditation but yours might be Yoga or Tai Chi or a new game. Maybe it’s learning a new song or instrument, or taking up a new sport? Perhaps it’s reading a different genre of book or trying a new meal at your favorite restaurant? Along the way, practice taking some time to stop in and “listen to yourself”. What is your body or feelings telling you about your recent experience? Which emotions are you feeling? How intense are they? Will you continue or try something new? Journaling along the way could be another useful tool to practice.
Each time you can build a new connection from your mind, being inquisitive about yourself/body, and receive the feedback and back and forth you are practicing listening to yourself or “listening to your feelings”. You can also learn to navigate strong feelings better along the way as well. Personally, after meditating for 2 years (almost) daily, I did find it easier to control my emotions, understand them and myself better, and shift them around when needed. Learning what emotions and feelings meant for me, contributed a lot too. I’ll share more about “breaking down emotions” in another blog post to come.
One of my favorite, go-to ways to tune in and listen to myself, is through what I’ve learned to call “body testing”. There are many ways to do body testing, some include a partner and other methods are solo. It is quite a common skill to learn as an empath too. For me, body testing helps me listen to my body and my gut reaction or instinct at the same time. It can be extremely helpful when I “can’t get out of my head” or struggle to decide because I don’t know what my body wants. A quick body testing exercise can often get me tuned in right away. A different way that I’ve learned to combine this skill with listening to my body, is when I’m ordering food and aren’t sure of what to have, I carefully review the menu, and the item that made my mouth water the most is the dish I choose. So far, I have yet to have a bad-tasting order after practicing that “listening skill”. If you want to learn more about body testing and how to listen to yourself, reach out to me or any empath you may be friends with – they may have other helpful tips to share too.
I would also like to share that when you first start practicing to tune into your body and listen to yourself, you might uncover some interesting or odd experiences but the more you can work through them, the stronger your mind-body connection becomes. Following this, personal growth simply happens and you become stronger and more resilient.
I wish you happy learning about yourself and remember to listen!
“follow your heart”, “listen to your feelings”, “trust your gut”, or “what’s your first instinct?”